One thing I've noticed.... there sure are a lot of little islands out in the Mississippi River.
And as I've looked at navigational maps, there sure are a lot of weird names given to those various islands.
A few......
- Deadman Island
- Hogback Island
- Nine Mile Island
- Bogus Island
- Little Bogus Island
- Dog Island
- Slim Island
- Long Island
Then there are these real creative ones.....
- Island No. 228
- Island No. 475
- Island No. 188
Plus, there are a whole bunch of islands that haven't been assigned any type of name at all.
These teeny-tiny islands are uninhabited, owned by the government, and often underwater when the Mississippi River floods.
Not exactly whatcha would call "prime real estate".
If it's all about "location, location, location" these islands score a big fat "F".
I've been doing some thinking...... wonder what it would take to get one of the "Island No. xxx" islands named after me?
"Honnold Island" or "Matthew Island" or "Isle of Matt". Something like that.
If only I knew who to talk to in order to get the renaming process started. Probably the Corps of Engineers.
I've already picked out my island:
Island No. 525
See it?
It's down at Grafton Illinois.
Why did I choose this one?
I can stand on the north edge of my island and see the Mississippi River. And, I can stand on the east side of my island and see the Illinois River.
Personally, I think this location is awesome! I cannot believe Isle 525 has never been given a serious name.
What would I do with my island?
I'd erect 2 things:
- a very large flagpole with a supersize American flag (like the ones you see flying above some gas stations -- and at the Perkins Restaurant here in Decatur)
- a windmill big enough to generate the electricity needed to light the flag at night
Wouldn't that be a neat sight?
WARNING: THIS POST IS NOW GOING TO MOVE FROM SERIOUS TO NOT-SO-MUCH --
One other reason why I chose Island No. 525.......
I can stand on the western side of my island and use my potato gun to fire spuds at the inhabitants of Mason Island.
That could be dangerous however, as that island is much larger than mine, and Mr. (or Mrs.) Mason might have an army of warriors (or snakes).
At that point, I would swim across the Illinois River over to Grafton and surrender my island.
I trust that the name would stick though. And hopefully, they'd leave the flag alone.
Out for now.......
Matt